A Military Solution
A tiny miracle happened: despite the failure of my play, the theater invited me to keep working on it–with lots of help from their staff. I was invited to perform an excerpt and teach a storytelling workshop at a conference, where I worked with military veterans. I also learned the cutting-edge of trauma recovery, including Prolonged Exposure, Narrative Therapy, and Eye-Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR).
Right after the conference, I found Leonard Levinsky, a guy who did EMDR (he looked like my dad – Hey there, Sigmund Freud).
I was glad because I was stuck again.
When I tried to treat my violation using EMDR, it didn’t work. Dr. L. said this was because my wounding included much more than my abuse. In essence, every fiber of my being was pervasively, profoundly powerless. I was inherently weak. My new shrink thought he could help me though.
Then, without warning, he closed up shop because of some landlord dispute. I was left without hope for ever finding a way to be a force in the world.
This was not just bad news for me, but for Kurt, who also saw Levinky¾for some mild depression. Once my father figure was gone, my husband began slipping away.